What has two thumbs and loves bad jokes?

What has two thumbs and loves bad jokes? My little corner of Das Internet.

I'm a little obsessed with everything Tolkien and GRRM. LOTR, ASOFAI, GOT, and all the according acronyms. But I have bad spelling and occasional lysdexia.

I study and teach Goju-ryu, Shorin-ryu, and Ryuku Kobudo.

I'm a Chemical/Biological Weapons Specialist for the U.S. muthafuckin' Army.

And this is what makes me think, giggle, and ponder the meaning of life.

Also, tits.

Next time on Ramsay’s kitchen nightmares…

Next time on Ramsay’s kitchen nightmares…

NEVER RUNNING FROM A REAL FIGHT.SHE IS THE ONE NAMED SAILOR MOON.

Reblogged from nudityandnerdery

NEVER RUNNING FROM A REAL FIGHT.

SHE IS THE ONE NAMED SAILOR MOON.

Reblogged from guccipenis

missmurrka:

twilights-blue:

sarrel:

Ingredients:

CINNAMON FILLING:
4 tablespoons (1/2 stick) unsalted butter, just melted (not boiling)
1/4 cup + 2 tablespoons packed light brown sugar
1/2 tablespoon ground cinnamon

CREAM CHEESE GLAZE:
4 tablespoons (1/2 stick) unsalted butter
2-ounces cream cheese, at room temperature
3/4 cup powdered sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

PANCAKES:
1 cup all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 cup milk
1 large egg, lightly beaten
1 tablespoon canola or vegetable oil

Directions:

Prepare the cinnamon filling: In a medium bowl, stir together the butter, brown sugar and cinnamon. Scoop the filling into a quart-sized heavy zip baggie and set it aside (see *Tips below).

Prepare the glaze: In a small pan, heat the butter over low heat until melted. Turn off the heat and whisk in the cream cheese until it is almost smooth. Sift the powdered sugar into the pan, stir and add in vanilla extract. Set the pan aside while you make the pancakes.

Prepare the pancake batter: In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder and salt. Whisk in the milk, egg and oil, just until the batter is moistened (a few small lumps are fine).

Cook the pancakes: Heat a large, nonstick skillet over medium-heat and spray with nonstick spray. Use an ice cream scoop (or 1/3 cup measuring cup) to add the batter to the pan. Use the bottom of the scoop or cup to spread the batter into a circle (about 4-inches in diameter). Reduce the heat to medium low. Snip the corner of your baggie of cinnamon filling and squeeze the filling into the open corner. When your pancake begins to form bubbles, add the filling. Starting at the center of the pancake, squeeze the filling on top of the pancake batter in a swirl (just as you see in a regular cinnamon roll). Cook the pancake 2 to 3 minutes, or until the bubbles begin popping on top of the pancake and it’s golden brown on the bottom. Slide a thin, wide metal spatula underneath the pancake and gently but quickly flip it over. Cook an additional 2 to 3 minutes, until the other side is golden as well. When you flip the pancake onto a plate, you will see that the cinnamon filling has created a crater-swirl of cinnamon. Wipe out the pan with a paper towel, and repeat with the remaining pancake batter and cinnamon filling. Re-warm the glaze briefly, if needed. Serve pancakes topped with a drizzle of glaze.

DO WANT

guccipenis:

One of these don’t belong…That eevee isn’t evolved yet!

Reblogged from guccipenis

guccipenis:

One of these don’t belong

That eevee isn’t evolved yet!

(Source: chemistry)

Reblogged from fuckyeahloldemort

(Source: shibaconfessions2)

Reblogged from polishheart

twistedviper:

whorusszahhak:

perfectionistdia:

whorusszahhak:

don’t ever take me on a date to an aquarium because i will ignore you and spend the whole time looking at the fish

But, if you think about it, that’s all the more reason to go. The person you’re dating gets to sit back and watch you smile and have fun. All the while, he/she’s falling deeper in love with you.

thatS REALLY CUTE IM GONNA CRY

image

(Source: fefarielle)

Reblogged from polishheart

polishheart:

Right now, I need:

  • a massage
  • sex
  • a hot bath
  • many, many hugs
  • sex
  • more money so that 1 job will be enough for living
  • a backrub
  • a hot shower
  • someone to run their fingers through my hair
  • some hot food
  • soup
  • a foot rub
  • sex.

Yeah. I think that’s it. For now.

Adding to the list: enough hair for my girl to run her fingers through.

war-love-peace:

The Sword and the Serpent by John Maki Evans

Reblogged from seanoftheundead

war-love-peace:

The Sword and the Serpent by John Maki Evans

Reblogged from teakeeper

the old gods and the new

(Source: stark-queen)

tastefullyoffensive:

[trickrtreatr]

Reblogged from tastefullyoffensive

tastefullyoffensive:

[trickrtreatr]